What We’ve Learned Doing Circle Gatherings for Women

Learn more about our upcoming
Circle Retreat & Training for Women Advisors

Saturday, April 23, 3pm – Sunday, April 24th, 4pm
The Wigwam Resort, Phoenix AZ
*FPA Retreat runs Monday, April 25 – Thursday, April 28.
Register for both retreats, and receive a $100 discount on your FPA Registration!
The FPA Retreat advance registration deadline is March 18th!*

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There is a ‘secret sauce” in the circle gathering.  We, as the hosts, prepare, send invitations, encourage one person at a time, prepare our questions, set the room just right, bring the flowers, the chocolate, maybe the wine.  We take a few deep breaths, close our eyes and imagine the group of women settling into their chairs drawn into a circle and having a wonderful conversation.

We can’t imagine what will really take place, what will arrive in the center of the circle so to speak.  But something always does.  Maybe it arises in the spaces between the chairs, maybe someone finally can hear herself speak what matters.  Maybe one woman hears the tone of judgment in another and finally decides to let her own self-judgment go so she can move forward.  We never know what will happen.  It’s not ours to choose.  The only outcome we can try to control is that everyone felt safe and gently included, that the conversations were rich and relevant, that everyone had the opportunity to speak or not to speak.  We can hope that each person will gain some meaningful awareness, have an a-ha, feel the sweet warmth of empowerment and new energy, less fear, readiness, maybe even excitement and enthusiasm.  But this belongs to the group, to the circle itself, to each woman present.

What we forget about is how we, the hosts, will be transformed, maybe more than anyone.  Setting down our need to know more, to be the expert, to have the answers, here in circle we get to simply BE and participate.  To listen without agenda and finally really hear!  To hear our own voice without the need to be “smarter than. . .” or to deny our own money issues.  We feel the release in our shoulders from being genuine.  We feel our backs straighten and lengthen into a new sense of conviction and confidence that is authentic.

Yes we are getting the reports of clients coming in with more assets to invest or asking for my education and help; being more ready for advice and to move forward.  We’ve heard of prospects becoming clients because they were able to observe the advisor and experience them, trust planted.  Centers of influence (women) getting excited about inviting their clients next time, of gaining confidence in the advisor and the way they treat clients and change the conversation.  There are the intangible outcomes and the tangible ones that may actually take a little more time but will unfold.

This poem has resonated with the women advisors who have been in circle retreat and led their own circles.  It speaks to that part of ourselves that shows up in circle and breathes a sigh of relief, as we are finally able to catch our breath and catch up to ourselves, and maybe for the first time in a very long time, hear the truth and beauty of our own heart and mind.

From “Circle of Stones” by Judith Duerk

I am finding that it takes a lot of time to be a woman, to have a feeling of space and breath, a chance to sink into myself . . . as long as I take time every morning to light a candle to my life, it remains my life.  But if I hurry into work without that small moment of quiet, then I’ve already lost myself, and the day.  The task, for me, is to care, daily, for myself and my life . . . to love and to nurture, within myself, moment by moment, the quality of quiet presence, quietly being present to my life, which sanctifies it . . . to live as if the candle is lighted.

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